Journaling My Way Through Grief: A Personal Journey of Healing and Hope (Part I)

This is not the next journaling guide. Through my own personal journey of using journaling to cope with difficult emotions, I’ve come to realize that its not just a tool for writing down your thought, but a powerful way to navigate life’s challenges and find sense of purpose and clarity. And I hope that my experience and hurdles about it can inspire others who may be struggling to start journaling or going trough similar emotion.

Why I started.

In 2018, when my mother was first diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer, I was filled with fear and uncertainty about what the future held. It was a difficult time, and I didn't know how to handle my emotions. One day, I stumbled upon the idea of journaling in a book I was reading and decided to give it a try.

At first, it was difficult to get started. In fact, when I was first introduced to journaling, I hesitated to give it a try. In school, I was often told that my writing skills were subpar, so I associated writing with negative feelings. However, after my mother's cancer diagnosis, I knew I needed an outlet to help me navigate through my emotions. I started, even though I was still insecure about my writing abilities. I wasn't sure what to write or how to express the jumbled mess of emotions I was feeling. But as I continued to write, I found that the act of putting pen to paper helped me to navigate through the challenges of caring for my mother and coping with my own fears and anxieties.

I turned to journaling. 

Unfortunately, my mother eventually passed away in 2020, and the pain of losing her was overwhelming. I felt like I was drowning in a sea of grief, and it was difficult to find a way to move forward without her. But even in the depths of my pain, I turned to journaling. Writing became my lifeline during this time, helping me to process my emotions and find a way to make sense of the loss.

However, despite the comfort that journaling provided, I still felt like nobody truly understood what I was going through. Friends and family were like they couldn't comprehend the depth of my pain. I felt isolated and alone in my grief, and it was difficult to find a way to move forward. 

I felt less alone.

Through journaling, I was able to connect with my emotions in a way that helped me to feel less alone. Writing about the memories I had of my mother, and the experiences we shared, helped me to process my grief and to find a sense of peace in her passing. Journaling also gave me a way to express my anger, frustration, and sadness without fear of judgment or misunderstanding.

Moved forward. With a new purpose. Forever grateful.

In the end, journaling helped me to find a sense of purpose and clarity in my life after my mother's death. It allowed me to process my emotions in a healthy way and to begin to move forward with my life. And while the pain of losing my mother will never fully go away, journaling has given me a way to cope with the difficult emotions that come with grief, and for that, I will always be grateful. 

Status Quo.

Journaling has become a daily practice for me now. It's something I look forward to every morning. It's a time for me to check-in with myself, reflect on the day before, and set intentions for the day ahead. It's a way to prioritize my mental health and wellbeing. 

I know that everyone's journey is different, and journaling might not work for everyone. But, for me, it has been a powerful tool. It has given me a way to navigate through life's challenges and find my way back to center when things get overwhelming. If you're feeling lost or unsure about where to turn, I encourage you to give journaling a try. You might just find that it's the missing piece you've been searching for.